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  I squirmed uneasily. “Momma. . .” I looked at Zeke. I needed to talk to him first before I told her. “Momma, Zeke hasn’t shown me the backyard.”

  Zeke leaped from the couch. “Come on, Jay.”

  Momma stay seated, and I allowed Zeke to lead me into the yard.

  A young boy who appeared to be about his age dug into the dirt by the house with an old spoon.

  He peered up at us. “Hi, Zeke.”

  “Hey, Lamar! This is my sister, Jay.” Zeke grinned, glancing from his new friend to me. “Lamar lives next door.”

  The young boy held up a wiggling worm. “I’m getting us some bait for fishing.”

  “I’ll help you,” Zeke said, about to fall to his knees to dig in the dark dirt.

  I lifted him by his elbow. “Wait, Zeke. I wanted to talk to you first.”

  Zeke looked at me in dismay. “Now?”

  “Yes, now.” I wanted to get this over with as soon as possible.

  “All right. I’ll be back, Lamar,” he promised. We walked around the corner of the house to a side yard. An oak tree shaded a small bench, and we sat down.

  “Zeke, do you want to live here?” I waited for his response although I already knew what it would be.

  A smile spread over his face. “Yes! Lamar told me his big brother is gonna take us fishing.” He tilted his head and looked at me, frowning slightly. “If we get enough worms.” He squirmed, and I knew he would blame me if they didn’t.

  I nodded. “It sounds like you’ll have a lot of fun living here.”

  “We’ll have a lot of fun,” he corrected me. “I bet Lamar’s brother will let you come fishing with us.”

  “I’m not staying, Zeke. I’m going back to Plainsville.”

  His forehead furrowed. “Going back?”

  “I want to finish high school. You know I want to be a veterinarian. There’s a college near Plainsville where I can go to become one.” A lump formed in my throat. “But Momma wants you to stay here.”

  “Without you?” The creases deepened.

  “Yes, without me. You’ll have Momma. And Lamar. And you’ll make more friends.”

  “Jay, I don’t want to stay here without you. What if Momma ...” His eyes clouded as if he relived an old memory.

  “She’s better, Zeke. Besides, Uncle Colt and Aunt Jenny will watch out for you.” I hugged him to me. “If you need me, just tell them, and I’ll come back.”

  “Promise?”

  “I promise.” I kept my arms wrapped around him until he began to squirm again.

  “Jay, can I go look for worms now?”

  “Sure.”

  He leaped up from the bench and scampered around the edge of the house. A sharp pain pierced my heart. He’d forget me. He’d half forgotten me now in the joy of making a new friend.

  Yes, people changed. Zeke was growing up. Yet, worry still gnawed me. What if Momma began acting strange again? And I wasn’t here to protect him? Was it wrong for me to leave him when I might be putting him in danger?

  I followed Zeke back to the backyard and watched for a moment as he extracted the wigglers from the ground, his face full of laughter. I left Zeke digging worms and went back inside.

  Momma, in the kitchen, pointed to the icebox. “You thirsty, Sarah Jane? I’ll make us a glass of iced tea.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” I said. It felt strange for Momma to be waiting on me. I resisted the urge to do it myself.

  Momma and I settled back in the front room with our glasses of tea. The house had been built to take advantage of even a hint of a breeze. With all the windows opened, the wind made the curtains flutter.

  I liked the house. I felt comfortable here. Surely, Zeke would be happy here.

  I took a sip of the iced tea before speaking. “Momma, I’m not staying.”

  “Why?” She didn’t look angry, only curious.

  “I want to finish school and go to college.”

  “I just don’t understand you, Sarah Jane. Women don’t need education. They just need to find a good man.”

  “Were you raised that way, to believe women do not need to be educated?”

  She stared at the wall behind my head for a long minute before her eyes refocused on me. “My mother raised me to catch a husband. A wealthy one if I could.”

  “She did?” I asked, curious about her upbringing, trying to see her with new eyes.

  “My family wasn’t rich, but we weren’t poor. My father had a good job. I was an only child, and my mother had big plans for me.” She closed her eyes for a moment.

  “Where are your parents now?”

  “Dead. They both died before I met your father.” She took a sip of tea. “Yes, I was taught a good marriage is all you need to be happy.”

  “Momma, I want more.” I had told her this before. Did she remember?

  She slowly shook her head at me. “I don’t understand that. I guess I’ve never really understood you, Sarah Jane.”

  “I’ve wanted to be a veterinarian for as long as I can remember.” I hesitated. “I could stay here for a while, until Zeke settles in.”

  Momma shook her head. “No, go on back. I don’t want to keep you from doing what you want. I’m sure I can find someone to take Zeke to school.”

  Did she really mean that? Or, did she simply want to get rid of me? I studied her face. Could she really have changed so much? She didn’t seem angry, only sad, the corners of her lips slightly drooping.

  I rose and kissed her cheek. “Thank you, Momma.”

  Chapter 22—Trip with Daniel

  I slept on the couch and Zeke in his new room. After breakfast, Zeke and I went for a walk to see his new school, only three blocks from the apartment. I sighed with relief that it was such a short distance.

  When we arrived back, Daniel waited on the front porch. Zeke barely said hello before running to the backyard to find Lamar.

  “Well?” Daniel asked when Zeke had gone.

  “Zeke’s staying. I’m going back to Plainsville.” I shuffled my feet, slightly at unease when I remembered crying on his shoulder.

  “Let’s walk over to the drugstore. I’ll buy you a malt.”

  I hesitated for just a second. “Let me tell Momma.”

  I opened the door and stuck my head in. “I’ll be back in a little while. Zeke’s in the yard.”

  “All right,” she called back.

  When I closed the door, Daniel held out his hand. This time, I didn’t hesitate but threaded my fingers through his. We walked in silence, hand in hand.

  At the drugstore, we found a booth empty in the back corner.

  After Daniel ordered our malts, he gave me an encouraging smile. “I think you’re doing the right thing.”

  “I hope so.”

  “I’ll come see you when I can.”

  I nodded my head.

  “When are you leaving?” He reached across the table to recapture my hand.

  “Monday. That reminds me. I’ve got to go turn in Zeke’s bus ticket.”

  “Why don’t you turn in yours, too? I can take you back.”

  The malts arrived, and he released my hand. My first malt. I’d wanted one for so long. I drank half of it before I answered. “Sure. If it’s not any trouble ...”

  “No, I’m going back to camp on Monday, and it’s on my way.” He watched me drain the rest of the malt, a smile playing on his lips. “Good?”

  “Delicious. Umm ... how do you like the army?”

  “To tell you the truth, basic almost killed me. The drill sergeant was always in our faces, screaming.” He grinned at me. “I have a bad habit of putting my hands in my pockets. The drill sergeant chewed me out a couple of times when I did it again. He told me to go find two BRs.”

  “BRs? What’s a BR?”

  “Exactly. I had no idea. Finally, after I had searched around for a while, he screamed ‘Big Rocks!’ He added a few colorful words that I won’t repeat. I had to carry huge rocks in my pockets for three days.”


  I laughed, and his face lit up. “It’s good to hear you laugh. Even if it is about me.”

  I laughed again. “Sounds like the army’s pretty tough.”

  “That was basic. Now, things are much better.”

  “I’m glad.” And I truly was.

  “Another malt?” he asked.

  Was I being too greedy? I didn’t care. “That would be swell.”

  And he chuckled before ordering me another one.

  Momma agreed to let Daniel drive me back to Plainsville. Leaving wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be. Daniel promised Zeke he would bring me back to visit whenever he could, and Zeke seemed satisfied with that.

  The trip back to Aunt Liza and Uncle Howard’s flew by with Daniel keeping me entertained with more stories about the army.

  Chance greeted me, his entire body undulating with each wag of his tail. Daniel and I spent a moment with him before going in.

  Aunt Liza and Uncle Howard, expecting me back later on the bus, looked up in surprise when we came into the sitting room.

  Uncle Howard’s face, dark as a thunder-cloud, didn’t clear when he saw us. After a moment, he made a visible effort to speak to Daniel in a normal voice. Aunt Liza’s eyes looked as if she had been crying. What in the world had happened while I was gone?

  “You’re early,” Aunt Liza said. It sounded like an accusation.

  I indicated Daniel. “He offered to drive me home, so I wouldn’t have to ride the bus.”

  She nodded listlessly, not even making an effort to be civil.

  “Where’s Zeke?” Uncle Howard asked.

  “Momma’s much better. Zeke stayed with her,” I said.

  Aunt Liza’s head snapped up. “He’s not coming back? You left him?” Her eyes filled with tears.

  I glanced at Daniel, feeling uncertain again, and he nodded his encouragement.

  “Momma’s living in town now and has a job. Zeke wanted to stay.”

  “I’m sure Jenny and Colt know how to watch out for Zeke,” Uncle Howard said forcefully.

  His face darkened even more, and I licked my lips, afraid of this side of my uncle I had never seen. “Yes, they promised me they would. I’m sure he’ll be okay.”

  Aunt Liza nodded her head, squeezed her eyes tight, and bowed her head.

  Daniel looked uncertain for a second. “I’ve got to be going. It was good seeing y’all again.” He shook Uncle Howard’s hand.

  Aunt Liza didn’t respond.

  Daniel’s eyes filled with concern when I walked out with him. “I hate to leave you ...”

  I shook my head. “It’ll be all right. They probably just had a little argument. All couples argue sometimes, don’t they?”

  “I suppose.” He leaned back against the car, folding his arms. “It seems more than a simple argument.”

  “Maybe she burnt the biscuits?” I spoke lightly.

  He chuckled. “Yeah, maybe something that simple.” He pushed away from the car and faced me. “Let me know if you need me? Promise?”

  “I promise.” After all, who else did I have?

  He kissed my forehead, and I watched him leave, knowing I would miss him.

  Or, at least miss the malts. I laughed at myself and went into the house.

  Aunt Liza had retreated to the kitchen and had poured herself a cup of coffee.

  “Where’s Uncle Howard?”

  “He went out to his shop.”

  I joined her at the table. “What’s wrong with him, Aunt Liza?”

  “I reckon Howard’s upset about Zeke.” Aunt Liza shook her head sadly. “We’re going to miss that young’n.”

  “No, he was angry when we came in. Something else is wrong.”

  She sighed heavily and averted her eyes. “Howard lost the job.”

  “Oh, no! What happened?”

  She shrugged her shoulders and stared into her coffee cup. “I don’t want to talk about it now.”

  I walked over and hugged her. “All right. But let me know if you need to talk.”

  She simply nodded, and I left her nursing her coffee.

  I walked to the barn, led Red out, and saddled him.

  Did Uncle Howard lose the job because he had been drinking? Could he be the one Michael meant? If he was losing jobs because of drinking, maybe I should talk to him or Aunt Liza, tell them of Alcoholics Anonymous. But, what if I was wrong?

  And, really, was it any of my business?

  At any rate, I needed to find work. I had been a financial burden long enough. I swung into the saddle, resolving to help my aunt and uncle. Maybe Marla’s father would help me find a job.

  I decided to go see him first thing tomorrow.

  Chapter 23—Michael & Sylvia

  Marla’s father only knew of a babysitting job. One of his friends owned a florist shop, and his wife helped part time with the bookkeeping. I would work only three days a week, babysitting her children when she worked.

  At least it was a job, and one I liked. The two boys were six and four. The oldest helped ease my loneliness for Zeke. The youngest was always into mischief. He kept me from dwelling too much on my troubles.

  Troubles that now seemed to be receding, even though I missed Zeke. Marla and I spent as much time together as we could.

  Her aunt, a great aunt, passed and left Marla a small sum of money. Marla used it for braces. Whenever she smiled, the gold in her mouth flashed, even in the dimmest of light.

  Sylvia kept her distance, and I heard no more from Michael. I assumed he was in Auburn, but here in Plainsville I never saw him. And, that was a relief.

  And there was Daniel. His camp was close enough that I saw him often. We’d spend Saturdays riding horses, playing with Chance, and taking in afternoon matinees. Of course, I missed Zeke, but Momma and Aunt Jenny wrote often, and I knew he was flourishing.

  So life went on. Then, one summer night, to celebrate my sixteenth birthday, Daniel asked me to go with him to dinner and a picture show in the large city near his camp. He thought we should make a party of it by inviting my friends.

  Marla now had a boyfriend, Andrew, and they both were eager to go. Andrew’s sister Anne, not wanting to be left out, made Andrew fix her up with one of his friends, a boy I didn’t know named Tommy.

  When we arrived at the theater, Daniel insisted on paying for everyone’s admission, amid their half-hearted protests.

  We settled into our seats and chatted about his horses as we waited for the movie to begin. The theater darkened, and he reached for my hand, his grasp, warm and strong.

  I barely concentrated on the movie, thinking about his nearness in the dark. I tightened my fingers around his, and he gently squeezed my hand.

  Katharine Hepburn and Cary Grant couldn’t distract me from my thoughts. What I had felt for Michael had been a fantasy. Daniel was reality — kind, strong, and reassuring. The army had changed him, the army and AA. And, I was thankful. I didn’t know how I could have gotten through the last month or two without him.

  After the movie, we headed for a diner. Although crowded, we found a table against the back wall to fit all of us. Daniel pulled his chair close to mine and put an arm across the back, letting his hand drape along my shoulder.

  “I can’t believe that show,” Andrew said, shaking his head.

  “What do you mean?” Anne asked.

  “The whole thing was just crazy. A leopard named Baby.”

  Tommy nodded. “And a circus just happens to be in town, and a wild leopard just happens to escape.”

  “Unbelievable,” Andrew said.

  “Cary Grant is dreamy,” Anne said. “That makes up for all the plot problems.”

  Marla and I nodded our heads in agreement.

  Tommy curled his lips into a look of disgust. “Dreamy in a — what do you call it?” Tommy asked.

  “Negligee.” Anne smiled at him. “He’s dreamy in whatever he’s wearing.”

  The boys and Daniel laughed, shaking their heads. A pretty waitress came to the table, a
pencil stuck behind one ear.

  “What’ll it be?” She had a bored expression on her face until she saw Daniel. Her eyes brightened as she looked directly at him.

  I felt a pang of jealousy.

  “Six milkshakes. Three chocolate, two vanilla, and one strawberry,” Daniel said.

  “Yes, sir.” She smiled as she walked away.

  Andrew punched Tommy’s arm. “Uniforms sure get attention. I’m joining the army as soon as I graduate.”

  Anne frowned at her brother. “You need good looks if you want attention like Daniel gets. And you’re a little — short in that department.”

  Daniel’s cheeks reddened as much as Andrew’s as the rest laughed. I turned my head, not wanting to embarrass him more.

  The door of the diner swung open. Michael and Sylvia walked in.

  My mouth fell open, and Marla turned to follow my gaze.

  “There’s Sylvia,” she said, in surprise.

  Everyone turned to look.

  “Wow. That fellow she’s with is better looking than Cary Grant!” Anne said.

  The color in Daniel’s face deepened, and he frowned briefly. Then he smoothed his forehead and straightened his shoulders.

  “Michael!” Daniel called.

  My head snapped up. Why would he call Michael over here? Warmth flooded my cheeks, yet, I couldn’t tear my eyes away as Michael walked toward our table, Sylvia clutching his arm. Michael smiled easily, his eyes sweeping the table.

  “Care to join us?” Daniel asked.

  I looked at Daniel in amazement. Why would he invite Michael to sit with us? I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. Surely Michael would decline. But, no, he held a chair out for Sylvia and sat down at the end of the table next to Daniel.

  Michael grinned at me. “Hi, Jay.”

  “Hi,” I croaked. What was wrong with me? I was over him, wasn’t I? Daniel was worth ten of him. But my heart wouldn’t accept what my head knew.

  Daniel made the introductions while my heart beat erratically. I chewed on my bottom lip and let my gaze fall to my hands. Michael. With Sylvia. How could I bear it? I tried to chide myself. Wasn’t I just thinking Daniel was so much better than Michael? And, now, I was a trembling mass of emotion.

  Daniel chatted easily with Michael, asking how college was going.